Skip to main content

Matthew Barney and Björk go shopping

By Paul Schmelzer

Back to Reader

From McSweeney’s, headlined “A SELECTION FROM GEORGE W. BUSH’S EAVESDROPPING TAPES: MATTHEW BARNEY AND BJöRK PLACE AN IKEA PHONE ORDER”:

MATTHEW BARNEY: (On phone.) Matthew. Barney. Sure. It’s called the Flrke. F-L-A-R-K-E. It’s a bookshelf.

BJöRK: (In background.) Ask if they have an aluminum igloo.

MATTHEW BARNEY: (Muffled.) I’m on hold. I’ll check when he gets back on.

BJöRK: (Giggling.) Imagine if clouds were made of licorice!

MATTHEW BARNEY: Flrke. With an umlaut over the a. Also, my wife was curious if you sold aluminum … Yes, I can hold again.

BJöRK: The winter makes me feel particularly blinkered.

MATTHEW BARNEY: The Flrke is in stock? Great. Another quick question. My wife is Scandinavian and she was wondering if you had any aluminum … All right, I can hold.

BJöRK: Icelanders complete the echo with feel.

MATTHEW BARNEY: You’re kidding me. If you can’t deliver it, why do you have the option to order by phone?

BJöRK: Pandas are sexy.

Via reBlog.